Just another WordPress blog..

‘Selfish’ by Nature..!

I was on my usual early morning brisk walk. With nothing unusual to capture my attention on the street, I decided to imagine that I was strolling on a fantasy beach.

“Dad.. Wait for me. I want to walk with you..”.

A familiar sweet voice pulled me back to reality! Surprised to see my little one up so early, I slowed down.

“Dad, isn’t it selfish to put on the oxygen mask before helping someone on an airplane?”

Dad and child

Selfish by Nature

With an indulgent expression on my face, I thought “Wow.. My 7-year-old is growing up!”.

I thought of the days when the incessant flow of questions sounded more like:

“Dad, do people eat burgers on the moon?”
“Why is it Sunday today?”
“Will it be Sunday the whole day?”
“Why are you wearing a blue shirt?”
“Why do you like your car soooo much?”
“Do you like your car more than you like to comb your hair?”
“Why does Mandrake live in Xanadu?”
“Are there trillion billion butterflies?
“Are you wearing a blue shirt today?”
“Will the pink elephant be sad if I talked to a blue elephant?”

I  learned a significant lesson when she was about two. She wasn’t really looking for answers (at least not from me!). She just wanted the freedom and space to ask questions.

Since then I have almost always allowed her to keep her sense of curiosity by giving very profound (!) responses like:
“Aahhh, I hadn’t thought of that!”
“Hmmm..”
“Errr.. maybe..”
“Hmmm..”

This morning seemed different.

Being a medical doctor it was easy for me to look for analogies within the human body.

“You know the Human Body chart we looked at the other day.. do you remember what we learned about the heart, blood, the veins….”

“Yes, and the Aorta..”

“Yes! The heart has the tremendous responsibility of pumping blood and supplying oxygen to every cell in our body, including its own cells and the muscle cells in the wall of the heart itself..”

I could see that I had caught her attention.

“Now, the Aorta is…”

She jumped in, “..the largest artery that comes out of the heart.. isn’t it, dad?”

“Yes, baby.. Guess which  organ it supplies to first?”

“The heart?”

“Yes! Nature has made certain that the heart muscles are supplied first before any other organ.. even before the brain..”

“Oh..”

“So we can take a lesson from Nature and make sure that it is important… no, essential for us to look after ourselves first..

“Yes, dad.. If there is trouble in the airplane, I must wear the oxygen mask first. If I can breathe, I can help someone else breathe with their own oxygen masks..”

“When we are healthy and whole, we can help others reach the same goal. Is that a selfish thought?”

Just then, a bright blue sedan sped past us enveloping us in a dark cloud of smoke.

She reached out for an imaginary oxygen mask, pulled it over her mouth and said,

“No. But that car is selfish..”

“Car?”

“It is polluting the air…”

Advertisement

Comments on: "‘Selfish’ by Nature..!" (11)

  1. Insightful. Thanks

  2. aisha nikhat said:

    xclnt. only wen u r. healthy n cmplete will u b able to care for others.

  3. Kathy Ann said:

    Well written! Appreciate your subtle style.

    You have brought up several points here.

    Allow children retain their sense of curiosity.
    Follow nature’s cues for a good life.
    Ensure your survival before lending a hand.
    Include the environment.

    Jasmine, I am curious to know your view on this:
    How does one know that one is well enough mentally, emotionally and spiritually to support others?

    Kathy Ann

    • Kathy: Thanks!

      If I were to summarize my thoughts, it would be just two words – Self Awareness.

      I have been a care-giver for a relative a good part of my life. Learned about self-care the hard way!

      I realized that the Essence is to look after oneself as well, while playing a supporting role. You are perhaps aware that in some cultures it maybe considered selfish.

      It clicked for me when I really understood the significance of self-care as an everyday thing. Like spending 5 minutes with a little child.. Then it became far easier to dance with both (self-care and supporting another) even during trying times.

      Would love to hear your experiences..

      • Kathy Ann said:

        Aaha! That is the key. Everyday self care. Thank you Jasmine! How easy it is to forget the basics.

        I am a care giver for three seniors. I have two young children that need my attention. I am trained as a therapist. Couple of years ago people told me that I looked too burdened and unhappy. Friends began to suggest that my sadness was affecting them. Although I could see that my clients were doing well with me, self-doubt started creeping in and I decided to close my practice last year.

        Am curious to know if you have faced a similar situation.

  4. i love slice of articles. i like this one for its simplicity, yet profound insights.

  5. sorry o! that was meant to be ‘slice of life’ articles. i like this one for its simplicity, yet profound insights.

  6. Just what I needed…constantly battling my own perceived selfishness vis-a-vis my daughter :)

  7. Neha Karande said:

    Hey Jas,
    Love the article! extremely innocent and yet so profound :)

    Real food for thought!

    PS: Love the cartoons :)

  8. Good one. Very relevant …Just Be Selfish…!!!

    If you can make a difference to another person’s Life …Stay Selfish

    If holding on to something is Selfishness then hold your anger…Stay Selfish

    If having more than what you need is Selfishness then have more Love and Compassion …Stay Selfish…

    Just be Selfish about Yourself coz in the end the Guy in the Glass makes all the difference…

    He is the truest reflection of them all…Stay Selfish to gaurd the guy in the Glass…

Share your thoughts..

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Tag Cloud